Tuesday, April 15, 2014

A legit reason

One of my friends stated that the reason why he’s thinking of Radition Oncology for a residency is, “so I can say “that’s RADONCulous!” on a regular basis...”

I think that someone has gotten in with that answer on an interview before.


Tuesday, April 8, 2014

Health care savings

This was an interaction I had with a patient close to discharge over the weekend (pending him feeling well enough to go home):

Me: “How are you feeling today?”
Patient: “Terrible! I’m nauseous and my balls hurts and every time the pain comes on I get nauseous.”
Me: “Hm, I’m sorry to hear that! Are the anti-nausea agents helping a bit at least?”
Patient: “You know what would help? A room at the Hilton (there’s one maybe a few blocks from the hospital). Some nice terry cloth robes and room service - would take this all right away.”
Me: “Haha! That’s quite the suggestion.”
Patient: “No, I’m serious. The government allocates what, $1500 per patient per night at the hospital? A room would cost me $200-$400/night and I don’t know of one doctor here who wouldn’t come and ‘supervise’ my treatment. That’s a great savings for the government and I *guarantee* you I’d feel better.”
Me: “… Hm, you make a good point. I want in on this deal.”


Monday, March 31, 2014 Sunday, March 30, 2014

I am simply not there

It’s probably the post call watching of American Psycho, but now I have an incredible urge to use the line “I have to return some videotape” to leave a bad consult. 


Wednesday, March 26, 2014

Home sweet home?

You know you’ve been spending too much time in the hospital when you get back to your condo and try opening the front lobby doors with your hospital access key card instead of your actual home card. 

And not just once. 

Nope, not just twice.

Yeah took me 3 tries to realize what I was doing wrong.


Monday, March 24, 2014


We are doing a lap chole later today. We are working with a different consultant, so my senior resident asks if he prefers to scrub in and do the main work or to main the camera.

He states that he’d rather just scrub in and observe. He apparently trained in the era of open lap choles, but as a consultant, when they switched over to laproscopic work he was well into his subspecialty practice and he never got into it.

Why might you ask? He’s terribly claustrophobic and apparently any laproscopic work is a trigger for that.


Friday, March 21, 2014

Midnight snack

Chilling in OR lounge, plastic resident wants to chat with my senior.

"You cannot believe the case I just got." he says.

"Emerg thought we had some nec fasc (slang for flesh eating disease), so I go look at his . They say it’s under the pannus."

"He has a high BMI, and had multiple body folds. As I approach I can smell something foul. He does not look too distressed, so I thought it was weird."

"so I see something under one fold and I lift it up. It smelt bad, looked terrible, but I knew it wasn’t necrotising fasciitis: it was mould."

After a bit of questioning and cleaning up the area the resident realized it was some sort of rotten organic material, not the patient’s body.

"in the end, turns out the guy used to put snacks and other food on himself as a tray. A bunch must have fell in, got trapped, and grew mould."

I’m not happy he waited for lunch time to tell this.


Monday, March 17, 2014


Call it the unfortunate luck of the Irish, but every Gen Surg consult I did today that required admission involved a person who grew up in Ireland. 

3 of the 4 operations done today were on people with Irish backgrounds.

None of them were related to copious alcohol drinking. 


Wednesday, March 12, 2014

Insult to injury.

One of the medical schools recently had their application fee system hacked. Tons of reports of credit card theft happened across Canada.

One of my friends was a victim.

"$3300* gone." he told me.
“what’s worse is that I applied ages ago and was told all the spots for the site I wanted was filled. I got rejected.”

He had nothing else to say but a short laugh.


*not the exact amount (it was a lot)
Sunday, March 9, 2014

What are the odds

A pediatrician friend of mine was telling me of an amazing case that he experienced in his 1st year of residency.
He had a 18 year old and 5 year old girl both come into the ER while he was on shift. The 18 year old was reporting some abdominal pain and the 5 year old had a fever and sore throat.

He decided to do a serum b-HCG for the 18 year old. So he wrote the order on the chart.

A while later he gets a call from the lab asking why he ordered the b-HCG. He then realized he ordered it for the 5 YEAR OLD.

He was just about to go rush and explain his mistake when the lab told him it was positive.

They did an abdo CT and found a germ cell mass. It was detected early and removed. The girl was fine in the end.

What a fortunate catch.